What gift to Valentine's Day to his girlfriend?

①
When the child accidentally scratched his fingers, and said to my mother, my mother said that salt will not bleed the salt.
Then I sprinkled the salt, my mom smiled for a day.
Really mother! The

②
People are male deceived: I hold you sleep do not do anything, I will Cengceng to go in, I went in fixed, I will not move, then shot or later.
And I was deceive boyfriend: Cengceng not come in, it does not move in, it is not moving, and finally shot [cover their face]

③
"Wife, can I go to the balcony to stand?"
"How do you think that the middle of the night is so cold, you go to the balcony Gansha! Cold how to do, but you are the pillars of the family, if you fall down, how can we do this home!
"But my wife, the washboard is really hard, I can not kneel .."

④
On the bus, I do not know who put the fart, suddenly filled the entire car, and this goods did not stop the idea, and finally a man could not help but patted a tall skirt wearing a skirt next to the tall beauty said: Old girl, can we restrain it?
This woman 's blush, said: "What do you say I do not understand ah!
"Do not you leave your thigh, you do not fart, short skirt can lift a together?"

⑤
What gift to Valentine's Day to his girlfriend?
I just remember that she told me: will be good to raise you to send me a small tadpole!

⑥
Primary school when the school picnic arrangements, ask you to work with children, some people with rice, some people bring vegetables, some people with pot ... ...
Hard to come to the destination, with rice and rice are in the Qi, and some people also brought sweet potatoes, greedy we have swallowed, eagerly hope that the pot with the finally came to see him When we desperate ...
Especially he actually gave him ten months old sister cook rice cereal small milk pot so come!

⑦
I used to go out with the leadership to eat, in order not to drink that I am ready to have children, we will not let me drink.
So that for a year, a return to the leadership and persuade the wine, I said I was ready to children, the leadership suddenly told me: "small X ah! Sick cure ah ..."

⑧
Female boss husband in foreign training, each year only two can see the first time.
Once I was in her house to see the animal world, female boss said to himself: this life is like a dog.
A poor dog I wonderly looked at her: not poor ah, Beijing, the second ring of 200 flat house, luxurious decoration ....
Female boss to resentment looked at me: I mean a year before the bitch sent a situation!

⑨
My wife did not know why suddenly scolded me, I coaxed for a long time she was calm down and asked: "You now know where you are wrong?
I angrily said: "What do you mean? Do not you wrong can not be you scolded?

⑩
One day, her husband came home from work, while eating and his wife chatting.
Husband said: you know? Next door Pharaoh carrying his wife with a woman out of the house.
Just finished, daughter-in-law tears said: I know that this can not hide you!